The desire for independence and read social studies 3rd grade is inherent in the development of a child from an early age. But it can be difficult for parents: how to let your child learn to be independent, see his failures – and not rush to help him or do everything for him?
Being able to gradually develop independence helps the child gain a sense of self-esteem and self-respect, face disappointment when things don’t work out, and learn to be persistent. Yes, it can be hard to watch, for example, how a preschooler is going to pour himself some milk – he climbs on a stool, opens the fridge, balances, then puts the cup on the edge of the table, the milk spills… Often encouraging independent attempts to do something means watching how an ordinary thing takes a child much longer than you, and dirt and disorder form around. It’s hard to watch a child try, fail, get frustrated, get angry, read 5th grade math multiple choice questions. Here are a few ways to help him – and be calmer yourself.
1. Establish a daily routine
A stable routine and a predictable routine are all important in fostering independence: let children know exactly what to do next. Even brushing their teeth is a routine because it consists of several steps that are always done in the same order: turn on the water, rinse the toothbrush, apply toothpaste, brush, rinse the mouth, grab a towel. As kids learn this sequence, they learn to anticipate what will happen next and are ready to use your help less and less: if you let your kid squeeze the toothpaste onto the brush, soon he will definitely be able to do it himself (and will remember exactly how to do it right).
2. Let your child choose
Another way to support independence is to give choices. Involve your child in discussions about everything related to him: what to wear, what to play, what book to read before bedtime. This does not necessarily mean that he gets complete freedom of action, it is better to offer two or three options, and then praise him for his choice. This way will also help to avoid conflicts when a preschooler insists on doing things his or her own way; just offer other options to choose from.
3. Ask for your help
Kids love to help! It both helps to gain independence and, in difficult or conflicting situations, shifts your child’s attention and gives him or her a sense of control. When you let him help you, you build his confidence and give him something new to learn. For example, when you make an omelet in the morning, you can ask the “assistant” to pour milk into the bowl, toss the shells, and stir the eggs. Besides, children will like the food, in the preparation of which they took an active part.
4. Run errands.
Even preschoolers can take on some chores at home. Even if they are still very easy errands (picking up toys or taking clean laundry off the dryer), they will be important stepping stones to move on to more serious tasks. Domestic chores help to develop responsibility, self-confidence, and teach teamwork. Tasks can also become part of the daily routine: for example, a child can always take his plate to the sink after a meal, and later help wash dishes or load the dishwasher.
5. Let her handle the challenges
Be sure to let your child try complicated things and solve small problems on their own. We often think that if he fails at something, he’ll get upset or throw a tantrum, but actually trying and small victories will only give him confidence. For example, if the child has put the shoes on the wrong foot, don’t point it out at once (and certainly don’t change his shoes silently), let him discover it or ask you for help. Being able to cope with tasks that are not exactly easy, but are still within the range of what the child can handle with some support, helps him to learn to solve problems and maintain self-control. You can admit that it was difficult, give praise for the effort, even if it didn’t all work out.
6. Encourage “projects.”
The child will definitely encounter project activities at school, so you can get acquainted beforehand with how projects are arranged: it can be some completed creative work, a handicraft or construction, or a model assembled from constructor parts. A project gives the child an opportunity to focus on a particular activity for a certain period of time – and to evaluate the result himself/herself. Suggest that the preschooler use a variety of art materials (crayons, markers, chalk, finger paints), building materials or other play props, empty boxes or paper towel rolls. Pay attention to what he likes best to guide and expand play: some are more into construction and others into the story of the games. You can comment on the activities, but don’t do them instead of the child.
It’s great when your child has enough opportunities to develop independence, but it’s also important to let him know that you notice his efforts, perseverance, progress. With this feedback, you also note the qualities that you want to develop in the child and increase the likelihood that this behavior will happen again. Praise actively and with enthusiasm, positively, explain what exactly you like: for example, “Great job! How did you manage to build such a tall tower?” or “I’m proud of you for solving that puzzle!”
Such positive attention is a serious reward.